# Introduction
 
Xvii.

- Is this true from our observation of culture?
- Are we specifically in this boat too?
    
    - What direction have we received?
    - Are we applying it in our parenting today?
- Claims about our culture:
    
    - Lost its way regarding parenting
    - No sense of direction
    - Can't direct ourselves
    - Have children, don't want to be parents
    - Need to quench personal thirst for fulfillment
    - Children viewed as a liability
    - Parents minimize time with children
    - Quality over quantity time

Xviii.

- Is this our generation or our parents'?
- Written in 1995
    
    - Protests in 60s led to rebellion against authority
    - This led to cultural rejection of authority
    - This affected parenting by destroying the "do as I say or else" method of parenting
- "the old ways of parenting no longer work" - did they ever? Was it effective or did it just lead to the rebellion of the 60s?
- Parents have responded in two ways
    
    - Give up (parenting is impossible)
    - Keep trying old "john wayne" methods

Xix.

- "the only safe guide is the Bible" - refreshing for me, when all other authoritative sources seem untrustworthy
- My thought: success in parenting, as with other things in life, is dependent on our view of God and his revelation (the Bible). If we believe it's His word and we can trust it, we have a solid way forward. If we don't, we have no way forward. We become the judges of how to parent. We first have to be humble to submit to His authority on the matter.
- "God's ways are no proved inadequete; they are simply untried". I feel like my parents, because they were first-generation, serious Christians, did go to Scripture and the Lord for biblical parenting.
    
    - Was this everyone's experience?
    - Or is what they saw more the "God's ways were untried" experience
- Biblical parenting
    
    - Kind authority
    - Shepherding children to understand themselves in God's world
    - Keep gospel clearly in view
    - Goal of someday living in mutuality
- Authority - nothing new, we all live under authority, whether parents or not. No surprise that parenting includes this aspect as well
    
    - Are we embarassed to be authorities for our kids? If so, what in our culture makes it that way?
        
        - Movie representation of parents?
        - "scientific" methods of parenting?

Xx.

- "empower them to be self-controlled" - is this why authority is "embarassing"? It's not understood as an empowering tool?
- Jesus is our example in "kind authority" -- though God, He came to serve
- "children generally do no resist authority…" -- powerful statement. But important that it's a mix of truly kind and selfless authority

Xxi.

- "Values and spiritual vitality are not simply taught, but caught" - we need to be examples in deed, not just word
    
    - how can we do this when we're tired, exhausted parents?
        
        - Refresh ourselves
            
            - Dates
            - Church
            - Friends
            - Vacation
        - Watch out for each other
            
            - This book study
            - Get together
            - Mom's get-togethers
            - Guys nights together
        - Stay connected with the Lord
            
            - Church attendance
            - Quiet time
        - Sacrifice! It’s not easy

Xxii

- Not simply well-behaved (external)--the gospel works from the inside out
- Gospel enables accurate picture of yourself and God
    
    - I'm a sinner who fails
    - God is righteous who saves with great grace
- Keepable standard
    
    - Because they're not christians?
    - I do it because it's easier! Not good….
- Impossible standard forces facing the gospel--powerful statement, never thought of it this way
 
Xxiii.

- "Each child will examine" - how else can we prepare? It will happen, give them the tools to do it well
- Mutuality as people under God - seems a long way off, but I’m looking forward to it, what a reward